by Margaret

(Sparta, NJ, USA)

What are the responsibilities for the mother-in- law at a baby shower?

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Apr 22, 2010

You think YOU have it bad..

by: Anonymous

My mother in law didnt OFFER to help MY mother with the planning, expenses, food… knowing the economy is the way it is, i feel as if i shouldnt HAVE to ask for her help, she shouldve offered to do SOMETHING, whether it be pitch in 50 dollars for decorations or making some food!!! My husband has yet to say something to her, the shower is in TWO days, and we are still needing balloons, some extra snacks, and baby shower game prizes… so tonight is the night he is going to FREAK out on her and let her know what the deal is, and how I SHOULD NOT BE STRESSING OVER THIS!!! OR HAVING TO PICK UP EXTRA EXPENSES!!! All shes been worried about is what shes going to wear to meet the new girlfriend of the ex husband, shes bought 4 dresses already… its ridiculous. if only you knew her!!! Ive given up on being nice and going out of my way to ask her if shes going to offer to do anything!!! so the hubby is taking over, thankfully.

Aug 04, 2009

left out mother in law

by: Anonymous

I, as a mother of the father to be, have been deeply hurt by being left out of the baby shower planning. I was also left out of the wedding because I was the grooms mother. I think that all grandmothers, regardless of who’s side it is on should be made to feel that they are involved 50/50. Just because you had a son should not make you an outsider. If it was not for the son then there would not be a baby. I was very close to my son when he was growing up and always looked forward to the day he got married and had children. But it has all been a big let down due to the fact that he was a son and not a daughter. I was so hurt by the fact of being left out that I called my mother-in-law and told her how much I loved and appreciated her and that I never realized it until I got done so bad at this very important time in life.

Apr 22, 2009

It’s completely up to the mom-to-be

by: Sonya

Hi Margaret,

This depends entirely on what the guest of honor wants. If the mother in law takes it upon herself to throw the baby shower, then she’s basically in charge of everything. However, I think it’s always polite to ask the mom-to-be who she want to be in charge of her shower.

If the mother-in-law is not the person throwing the shower, then whoever the host is will be in charge of distributing duties. If that person gives the mother-in-law something to do, then fine. If not, that’s fine too.

A lot of mothers-in-law feel kind of left out if they are not a part of the baby shower planning, because they feel like since they are one of the grandparents of the new baby, that they should be included. However, a baby shower is all about the mom-to-be, not necesarily the new baby.

When it comes time to start planning birthdays for the new baby, that’s when the mother-in-law should definitely have some responsibility.

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